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Starting Fresh

It's been a while. And I definitely feel rusty. But hopefully it won't take long for my brain to catch up with my fingers and type something more interesting than the weekly shopping list for Ocado. Or Lidl depending on how much money is in the bank that week.


With two little boys running round calling me mummy (artistic license at work here ~ my youngest is 7 months and not running or calling me anything) life has certainly changed from when I last wrote.

But after 5 years of almost constant change I suddenly find myself back sitting in the same spot at work where I always used to sit doing the same tasks I always did just as though the last few years never actually happened. Except they definitely did. I have the scars to prove it and also as soon as I get home I don't throw myself on the sofa and exclaim dramatically that I'm so glad the week is over and isn't it wonderful to have nothing to do.
I run upstairs to give lots of hugs and cuddles and goodnight kisses. If I'm lucky I make it in time to read a bedtime story and tuck them up tight. And then I run round the house bundling toys into specific boxes depending on what sort of toy it is. Even though I know the very next day they will all be out again forming a postmodern carpet all over our little house.


The thing that has been missing over the last few years has definitely been the writing. I had nothing to say after I finished the film script and my focus totally shifted towards having my oldest son and then eventually our youngest son too. They are my life and my focus and the reason I am sitting back at this desk making sure the money rolls into the bank (trickles, burbles, whispers) so we can have a good life outside of this office.


But...


...should I find an extra 15minutes here and there to write a line in my notebook or log on and finish a blog then I should definitely do that. Because after all I don't want to waste time that I'm not spending with my family. what would be the point of that? I am getting paid and I have to sit here but when the work eases off then I should ensure I am doing what I need to do to feel like myself again.


Because 5 years is just too long. So here goes.




My Boys ~ Photo by Jade Tinkler





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